hitting.

Ever since I witnessed something in Baby Vie yesterday, it's been weighing very heavily on my heart...Should I have said something?  Should I say something now?  What is my place?  How appropriate is it to assert my opinion and values?  Every parent wants, craves, and deserves autonomy in parenting.  Respect as a parent--from their child and from others.  Every single parent has a different heart, different priorities, different goals, different desires, different values...Even in the same family, no two parents are alike.  I respect our right as parents to be different from one another.  I respect other parents' prerogative to raise their children in the best way they see fit (within legal boundaries of course).

BUT...and isn't that where the most important statement is always made--after the but...I don't like hitting.  I especially don't like adults hitting children.  I know a lot of people believe that if you spare the rod you'll spoil the child and all that, but I don't like it. 

Yesterday, a mother brought her daughter, about 4 or 5 years old, to Story Time.  Presumably, the mother brought her daughter to have an enjoyable morning listening to stories and having some fun.  Trust me, I have seen some AWFUL children in my store.  Children come in who scream, throw, kick, break, run in and out the door...Not that my story would be made better by her bad behavior, but my story seems stranger because of her good behavior.  This little girl stood quietly by her mother...from what I could tell, not touching a thing or saying a word.  She must have done something the mother didn't like though because the mother whacked her across the back.   Not her bottom.  Not her hand.  Her back.  And looked at her like she couldn't stand her as she reprimanded for whatever happened.  The little girl continued standing there quietly while wringing her hands.  The mother smacked her hands and said something else hateful.  The girl stopped moving.

Hitting that stops short of being deemed abusive is legal in the USA.  CPS would not be interested in my story.  But it made my heart hurt.  It made my stomach turn.  It made me wonder how that child is treated when they're not in public.

Baby Vie is my store.  I don't like hitting.  I don't hit.  I especially don't hit children.  I cannot change your opinion about hitting or spanking or whatever you want to call corporal punishment of children.  You may agree with me;  you may not.  I don't wish to debate with you.  No words you will ever say to me will change the way I feel about this topic.  But since Baby Vie is mine, I get to make the rules there.  My official rule on hitting:  Do not hit anybody in Baby Vie.  If you disobey this rule, you are subject to scrutiny, comment and possibly removal from the store by myself and/or other members of the Baby Vie team.

To wrap up my rant, I would like to say that if you, as an adult, were to hit anybody other than your child, you could be brought up on assault and battery charges.  I would personally rather gain respect than fear.  Those children are not our property.  They are human beings who will choose our nursing homes someday.  Think your decisions through thoughtfully and lovingly.